One of my goals this month is to work on my marriage. You know how it goes…work, kids, activities, housework, and the list goes on and on…where do we find time to work on our marriage?
Well the answer to that is that we have to make time, we have to be intentional. So many days have gone by that my husband and I have just co-existed. We may have been at home together or somewhere else together, but we were not “together”. When we live this way, the devil slips right in and starts causing trouble.
God has really been convicting me about this. I really felt Him working on my heart as I read the marriage section in Courtney’s new book, Women Living Well. I can honestly say that I am not the wife that God expects me to be. Do you struggle with this too?
I have been studying the book of Ephesians lately. It is such a good guide book for our lives. I seem to get stuck at these verses…
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Ephesians 5:22-24
I read them, I understand them, but it is so hard for me to live them. The hardest for me is to “submit to their husbands in everything”. I catch myself saying “Everything? Are you sure Lord? I would but…” If I don’t see my husband doing what I think he should be doing, I just step right in and take over. As you can imagine, this does not help our marriage.
Another piece that I am working on is our communication. I am the one that just holds things in, really trying not to cause conflict, but all that stuffing has to come at some point…and boy does it! Instead of handling things as they happen, I explode and fuss about everything that has bothered me for weeks. It is not fair to my husband who has been oblivious to my thoughts and it just ends up being a fight instead of a conversation.
In Women Living Well, Courtney reminds us why marriage is hard…
“Because God made men and women differently! And when we come together and rub each other the wrong way, we can choose to repect and love each other’s differences or we can choose to fight.”
I don’t know about you, but I am tired of fighting. I have to choose to respect and love him. I have to make that choice each and every day if I am going to try to be the kind of wife God intended me to be. Will it be easy? No way and the only way I will be able to is through God’s strength and His Word.
I love this quote from Ruth Bell Graham, “A good marriage is the union of two forgivers.” I have to let the past go, focus on our present and future, and be willing to ask for grace when I mess up (because I will).
When we got married 17 years ago, I promised to love, honor, and obey my husband. I plan to take those words to heart and do my best to do each one.
Do you struggle in your marriage? Are there a couple of things you could work on this month? I’d love to hear from you and pray for you.
Blessings to You!
Check out Courtney’s FREE webcast tonight. The topic? You guessed it…Your Marriage!